I used to stream a lot, it would occupy almost 70% of my week. I would stay up late, buy more games that I could ever play. I’d set up 24hs streaming sessions, music playlists. I was having a lot of fun, but I was also very tired.

And then I pulled the plug.

And silently. A couple of months ago, when I started running around for other personal stuff, I had to make a choice, either keep pushing this way of living, or take a step back and observe what was going on. So I did the latter.

Like I’ve said, it’s a very tiring process, you need to have a decent hardware setup (you don’t really need expensive stuff to do it, but as a musician, I have certain standards about the quality of what I produce), you need to network, stay up to date with other streamers, and latest games, visit other channels, engage, market yourself, make giveaways, keep your social media updated. Ugh. It’s a full time job that needs years of being alone at your channel most of the time, until people start to drop in, stay, and you take off. Most of the times.

Not very different from a youtube channel, you need to generate quality content, and engage.

But if you already have a full time job, you can’t give 110% of your energy to streaming (or anything else, for that matter), and if you’re also in a relationship, or have a family, or even friends, things start to become even more difficult.

Sure, you can always say “hey, just do it whenever you feel to, no pressure”, but honestly, if I’m going to have my face burnt by all the lights and the heat from the streaming pc, I’d definitely want a viewer or two to share those gaming moments. And you need to have a regular schedule, and be constant about it if you want that last part to happen.

And then there’s the language. As you can tell by this, and previous posts, English is not my native language, and I have an accent. For some reason, this is a huge turn off for a lot of viewers, that once they hear me speaking, they leave to never come back. Which is fine, because, screw you if that bothers you :) It’s not like you can’t understand what I’m saying, I just have an accent, that’s it.

I could have my streams on my native language, or even Portuguese (which is my third language), but I’m just too lazy to do that, those are two very big different kind of audiences, and it would require triple the effort to maintain them.

This is not the only turn off issue for some of the viewers (which also includes other streamers). Demographics are also kind of a thing. Because I don’t live in the US, I’m automatically not in what I call the circle of streamers. No matter how small or big you are, if you spent a reasonable amount of time on twitch.tv, you know who they are, and if you’re not physically there to network with these people whenever there’s an event (say destinyCon), you’re missing out pretty much everything.

Don’t worry, I’m not complaining about other streamers, or that I’m being discriminated somehow (I’m not), or that it’s a hostile and very competitive environment. It’s just this is a ton of work that I’m not willing to do right now, and I prefer to quit entirely, until I feel I’m ready again.

I had A LOT of fun during these past four years of streaming. I’ve met the most amazing people who I’m still in contact with (and some of them I met personally, and we had a blast). I’ve played some great games (that I still play from time to time).

But I’m burnt out, and if it’s not fun, and I’m not getting paid to do it, then why do it, right?

There’re some big changes in my life coming up this year (good changes), and hopefully, once I’m settled in again, my energies will be renewed to give it another go. In the meantime, I’ll focus on my work, maybe keep updated this blog, and keep taking pictures.

See you soon, community!